If you didn’t get titty fucked so much your tits wouldn’t look so concaved and deformed and Ellen wouldn’t look so terrified. But by the look on POTUS 2016’s face, you can tell she was feeling euphoric staring straight into the heavenly LOTUS (#BUYLOTUS) of Christina “2 times Teen Choice Award winner” Aguilera.

oh okay beyonSAY! HA! I see you copying the original Renaissance Queen, Maria Antionette Aguilera. Bitchoncé is clearly the female Michael Jackson, she sings, dance, and even has Vitiligo.

This bitch bag not only copies new and struggling artists like Lana Del Rey, she also copies legendary artists like Christina Aguilera. Don’t she know #cake was invented in 16th century France by Christina Maria Antionette? It was bad enough that she tells ugly people they were born that way, now she’s trying to rap and be black like Xtina. She’s like an anorexic Iggy Azalea. I thought Fame Monster was back but no she’s just turning into more of an insufferable cunt. She’s also very racist against white people, like how dare she abandon her birth skin and try to become black? Pot smokers aren’t suppose to be racist.

Voicetina pays homage to WhatAGirlWantstina

It’s Sunday, and instead of being at church, you’re all sitting on Tumblr. Well its about time I give you heathens your weekly sermon.

The Legend of Christina Aguilera is a story that has been passed down for many generations. She died on the cross for the sins of the lessors and rose from the dead after 3 seasons of The Voice. It is often manipulated, reworded, and many failed attempts at duplication. One famous incident occured in 36 BC when Jésus tried to be all Christina-like so he pissed off some Jews and got himself murked. The after 3 days, you guessed it, he rose from the dead, walking out of a cave (ew, Christina came floating out of a beautiful Lotus™). Amen.

Chris Brown copies Christina’s Dirrty phase. First he pierced his nose and dyed his hair blonde (pictured above), then he collaborated with a rapper, next he changed his name to X Brown, and he even beat up a girl during a boxing match. How far is X Brown willing to go to be Xtina? Will he be wearing assless chaps next or slutting it up with 4 cholos in wifebeaters? Chris you disgust me with your attempts to emulate America’s National Angel.

Back during her Stripped Era, Xtina brought down racial barriers when she became the FIRST successful White/Latino/Black popstar. (Mariah Carey who?) She dyed her hair, got a tan and was accepted and loved within the urban community. Ten years later Presidential wannabe, Mitt Romney, wanted to appeal to the Latinos so he went on a national Mexican talk show with BROWN paint on his face. Do we really want someone who is a RACIST as our next president?